maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
