They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize