Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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