You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
