i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
