protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We are two peas in an std pod
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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