Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
