I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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