Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Is it because I queefed?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
