Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize