Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Don't make out with my wife yet
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
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