6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
