school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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