i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Randomize
