I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
