And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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