My pussy is not your playground.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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