I never want to see another naked old woman again.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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