when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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