trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
