So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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