you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
