I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
3pm strippers are depressing
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
