census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
