What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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