So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.