needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
