Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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