piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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