I don't think brook has ever known best
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
