It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Pappa wants mamma naked
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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