if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
