i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
