I think I died a long time ago.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
