there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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