What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
