I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
