i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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