well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Randomize
