He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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