I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I think I sprained my soul last night
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??