I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
