Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
