At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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