Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
