She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
