don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
