yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
