No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
