Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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